Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5... Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

18 . Procrastinate Now!

19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!
Life is too short and friends are too few!

Rodeo Houston 2009

Welcome to the word’s largest livestock exhibition and the world’s largest Rodeo event! The 2009 Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo kicks off March 3-22, and is quickly approaching over 2 million in attendance – requiring 19,000 volunteers! Going twenty days strong, Rodeo Houston is held at Reliant Park, and features bull riding, parades, carnivals, BBQ, wine tasting competitions, and loads of shopping! The Houston Livestock and Rodeo will feature Cattle auctions and cattle judging. Traditional trail rides, which start in different areas of Texas and finish in Houston, precede the rodeo. As a long standing rodeo tradition, March 16th has been deemed as Go Texan Day, where Houstonians and visitors alike are expected to don their best cowboy digs. Another tradition is the Rodeo Parade that kicks off the event. And check out the parade stats: 15 trail riders, 20 floats, 15 commercial wagons, 15 university and high school marching bands, dignitaries on horseback, and lots of balloons, all heading down Memorial into Texas avenue! One of the headlining Rodeo events is the super popular Calf Scramble, featuring 14 calves and 28 students trying to harness them and place them in the winners square. Students care for and prepare their prize calves, and the winner returns the following year with a $250 bonus! Most notable in Rodeo Houston are the celebs and concert performances in Stand-Up, Rock, Tejano, Blues, and Hiphop. In fact, the rodeo has drawn the world’s biggest music legends – does Elvis Presley ring a bell? Yup, he was a Houston Rodeo Performer! And 2009 will not disappoint. Kicking off the event is country superstar Tim McGraw, and set to perform are Faith Hill, Rascal Flats, and tween superstar Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana, making Houston Rodeo Tickets a serious must have! Join the party, and let’s Rodeo, Houston!

The Dog and the Rabbit

Hubby loves to reminisce.He loves to write about the past and share it to his friends,kids and of course to me.Tonight he send me an email,a story about his pet dog. I think it's funny for me.So I want it to share ya'll.

I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING THAT HAS BEEN YEARS AGO. I HAD A DOG WHEN I WAS YOUNG. HIS NAME WAS RUSTY. JUST A MUT. SOONER BE ANY BREED, ONLY PAPERS WAS THE ONES HE THROWN UP IN THE YARD. RUSTY WAS QUIET A DOG. FOLLOWED ME AND MY SIBLINS EVERY WHERE. WELL ONE DAY RUSTY CAME HOME WITH AN WHITE RABBIT IN HIS MOUTH. I KNEW RIGHT THEN IT WAS THE NEIGHBOR KIDS PET RABBIT. I ALSO KNEW RUSTY DAYS WAS NUMBER IF THEY FOUND OUT HE KILLED THEIR PET. SO I TOOK THE RABBIT OUT OF RUSTY MOUTH AN WENT TO THE BATHROOM, WASHED IT AND BLOW DRY ITS FUR WITH MOMS HAIR BLOWER. THEN I QUIETLY WENT AN PUT IT BACK IN THE NEIGHBORS CAGE. WOW I HAD SAVED RUSTYS LIFE. THEN THAT EVENING THE NEIGHBORS DAD CAME OVER TALKING TO MY DAD. HE TOLD MY DAD THAT THERE WAS A SICK, EVIL PERSON IN OUR NEIGHBOR HOOD. HE TOLD DAD THAT THEIR RABBIT HAD DIED THREE DAYS EARLIER. AND THEY BURRIED IT. SOME SICK PERSON DUG IT UP AND CLEANED IT AND PUT IT BACK IN THE CAGE. AND THE KIDS CRIED AGAIN FOR THEIR DEAD RABBIT. HUH YOU EVER TRY TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT, OR FIX SOMETHING BROKEN JUST FOR IT TO FLY UP AND BIT YOU IN THE REAR. I NEVER ADMITTED THAT I WAS THAT SICK PERSON, TRYING TO SAVE MY DOG FROM I THOUGHT KILLING AN PET RABBIT.

Woman's record-length fingernails broken in crash

A Utah woman listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for her long fingernails has lost them in a car crash.Lee Redmond of Salt Lake City sustained serious but non-life-threatening injuries in the accident.

Redmond's nails, which hadn't been cut since 1979, were broken in the crash. According to the Guinness Web site, her nails measured a total of more than 28 feet long in 2008, with the longest nail on her right thumb at 2 feet, 11 inches.

Consulate Outreach in TExas

Are you from Texas and need to Renew your passport?

Well it's time to renew now and you dont need to travel...there coming to Texas soon.A team from the Philippine Consulate General in Los Angeles will be conducting a Consular Outreach Program in two major cities in Texas .

Houston, TX on 12-13 March 2009 at the International Food Court located at Beechnut corner Beltway 8. Service hours will be from 9:00 am until 5:00 pm.

Dallas, TX on 15-16 March 2009 at the Memorial Park Recreation Center, 1950-B South Valley Parkway, Lewisville. Service hours will be from 10:00 am until 7:00 pm on 15 March 2009 and from 9:00 am until 5:00 pm on 16 March 2009.

For more information just check http://www.philippineconsulatela.org/